What does SkoDucks mean?
First off, because we believe information belongs to the people, we’ll translate that weird, often shrill cry of “Sko Ducks!” heard around Eugene, traditionally on Game Day. Phonetically: Omit the “Let” in “Let’s go Ducks”, leave the ” ‘s ” and say it fast: “Sko Ducks.”* . The phonetically fantastic vocable amalgam has become a rally cry for Duck fans — inebriated and lucid alike — who have either a) decided three syllables are too much (unlikely) or b) have made the (obvious) discovery that the joy in elongating and gently harmonizing the “o” at the end of Sko makes for one of the more compelling cheers one can emit in the Eugene area (much more likely). Or, in other words, it’s a fun way of saying “Let’s go Ducks.”
What is QuackTownUSA.com?
Welcome to QuackTownUSA.com, a site that covers all things Green, Yellow (and black and gray and white and graphite and chartreuse) and Oregon-bound through our kaleidoscopic lens, breaking it down then putting it all back together in whatever way we see fit. Like the Lorax, we speak for something, or someone. Unlike the Lorax, we don’t exactly speak for the trees. But thanks to Chase we are paperless.
The U of O is fast becoming the worthy heirs to the title of “Greatest Show on Turf”, a nifty little play on words that hasn’t deservedly surfaced since Y2K was, like, a really scary thing and Marshall Faulk was more versatile than a Leatherman, which is why we’re coming at the speedy Anatidae’s from a different angle, a more nationally-weighted angle, a younger angle.
We are going to provide liveblogs, live chats, Podcasts, previews, an acknowledgement of gambling (well, more than just an acknowledgement),open dialogue, fictional narratives, cartoons, Podcasts, troll bait and whatever else the casual to Glenn-Close-in-Fatal-Attraction-obsessed fan could want. We’ll do it with a flair that simply isn’t allowed in mainstream media, and we’ll do so without amplifying the ordinary, spinning the truth or sensationalizing the mundane (unless we warn you in advance) as so often happens on sports blogs.
This isn’t a place to critique all the hard work that the local newspapers and cable outlets are doing here in Eugene — you are irreplaceable to fans, teams and whatever-we-may-be alike, and do the noblest work to satisfy our irrepressible appetite for the new, shiny and jaw-dropping when it relates to the Ducks, which isn’t an easy task. Nor is it applauded enough. — but rather a variance, or a different way of looking things; a slight shift of the the observational sight-lines, if you will. We’re taking the “l” and turning it into an “/,” then, maybe, we’ll make fun of the “/” just for being weird.
There are few rules here at SkoDucks.com, but one sacred guideline: We will always be fair. We won’t take unnecessary shots above or below the belt. Yes, we will tell jokes, but we won’t require the ghost of Mike Gundy** to deliver one of his glorious, notorious post-game media criticisms on our behalf.
We love sports, all sports. They’re like our children, caught in a weird-yet-amicable custody battle between lunatics who play favorites, between sports snobs who fathered these poor information-addictions before we could properly pronounce “algebra” or decipher the socialist undertones in Call of the Wild.
Here it is, a site that we are tentative to call a blog, tentative to call a journalistic outlet, so we’ll settle somewhere in between. We’ll presume you really know sports, and we’ll gladly cop to being snobs. Put on your glasses, ride the wave, enjoy the ride and thanks for tuning in.
* Born from the ashes of the Large Electron-Positron Collider, the separate vocables were spun for miles at high speeds, then steered into a collision by the puppet-masters-that-were, and the result, like the Higgs Boson, was revolutionary. Skoducks.
** Mike Gundy isn’t actually a ghost, but his rant will never die. So I suppose he’s sort of like a ghost.